Twas 2 week before Christmas...

...and all through the house,
Not a cockroach was stirring, not even a louse.

The stockings were hung by the A/C with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas would find them up there.

The children weren't sleeping, they were fighting instead.
Perhaps I could drug them and put them to bedAnd Nate he's "not sleeping", he's just "resting his eyes",*
Meanwhile dreaming of Carrie Underwood and her killer nice thighs. As for me well I'm blogging cause that's what I do best**,
And the children are screaming from hours of neglect.
There’s lots I should do, the house it is stinking,
From dirty old diapers is what I am thinking.
The bathroom is nasty, it’s a hazard to shower,
Due to some mold and a cockroach named Howard***.
My laundry’s still sitting in the hall where I left it,
And odds are most likely I’ll never get to it.
Now I need to go shopping, that’s what I should do,
If my kids want to see Christmas and if Nate, he does too.
I’ll watch for the bargains (I’m cheap, it’s a curse)
Mentally preparing to shop before I immerse.
First it’s K-mart and Wal-mart (I’m queen of the ghetto)
Onto Target, and Kohl’s, and a quick stop at Costco.****
I’ll finish my shopping, I’ll call it complete.
Then I’ll go home, be domestic and make Christmas treats.
I’ll have good intentions of passing them out,
But then I’ll get hungry and with out a doubt
I’ll taste one, then two, and soon it’ll be four.
Before I know it I won’t have any more.
I had great intentions of spreading good cheer.
Unfortunately for my neighbors that won’t happen this year.Well at least my trees up, all shiny and bright.
And Macie’s abstaining from eating the lights.And even though my kids they are very wild,
They manage to keep on my face a big smile.And Nate regardless of how he does sleep,
I think a little longer around him I’ll keep.*****So during this season of chaos and crazy,
Take note from me it’s Ok to be lazy.
And so before that jolly old man comes in sight,
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!

*I told myself I was done taking pictures of Nate while he was sleeping, but honestly, how could I resist? And Nate really does have a thing for Carrie Underwood.

**Technically blogging is not what I do best. I'm good at lots of stuff like...ummm,...let me think...ummm...(surely there has to be something else I'm good at)

***We really don't have a pet cockroach named Howard, however Nate did find one in the shower several months ago. Howard just happened to be the only thing that rhymed with shower at the time.>

****I've actually never shopped at Kohl's. Not that I'm opposed to shopping there, I just haven't done it yet...again the only thing I could think of.

*****"I think a little longer around him I’ll keep". This is my poem, so I don't have to follow any grammar rules. What that line is supposed to say is I think I'll keep Nate around a little bit longer and longer doesn't rhyme with sleep. Unless I were to add an -eep to the end of the word longer, but then that wouldn't make any sense at all now would it.(I actually think I just confused myself now)