It's going to take more than a village...

NOTE TO READERS:This post is rated PG-13 for usage of the word hell. If this offends you please stop reading now. (I guess Nate won't be reading this one)

You would think with as much as I talk about Kaleb that he is an only child. Well...here we go again.

So lately I have been venturing out of my house with the three kids to go to the grocery store, which is a huge feat for me. Before now I would avoid going with the kids at ALL costs, even if that meant going at 11:00 at night (or just letting Nate go in my stead. I know...that was a sacrifice I was willing to make because I do love grocery shopping more life itself). Before going, I give myself a little pep talk, "Who's the mom?...I'm the mom! Who's in charge?...I'm in charge!...What's that? I can't hear you...I'M IN CHARGE at least I think I am", you know the usual. Doesn't everybody do that?

And we're off to the grocery store. We grab our cart, you know the ones with the massive car attached to the front where the kids can sit and they are so ridiculously big that when you back up there should be a beeper signaling people to get out of the way or else. And they're so clunky that there should be a "Caution: wide load coming through" sign on it. Yep that's the one we get....every time. This time my kids picked out a winner, I got the cart with the one wheel that seemed to have a mind of it's own. No matter which way you try to turn the cart this "one wheel" would go in the opposite direction (kind of like a certain child of mine). Not only did it have a mind of it's own but it made the loudest rattling noise announcing our presence to everyone in the store (as if I needed something else thing to draw attention to myself).

The list is small so I'm thinking we can totally make it in and out of the store with no casualties...Sadly today, this was not the case.

We started out great. Aisle 1-4 went as smooth as can be with the kids playing nicely with each other, while pleasant laughter filled our cart. Aisle 5-8 started getting a little shaky. The kids started to playfully tease each other and when people would walk by they would pretend to make unpleasant bodily function noises as they would pass. Aisle 9-10 the playful teasing had turned into a full on brawl complete with hair pulling and punching. We never made to aisle 11- 13 because by that time Kaleb had entered into complete melt down phase, where life itself seemed to be over...Oh, the pain, the agony of having to sit in in a cart for a half hour. If there was a hell, this had to be it.

You know the mothers that you pass in the store that have child throwing a massive tantrum and you look at them thinking either, I'm glad that's not me or learn to control your child. Well, I had become that mother that you see all too often in the store with the out of control child.

I quickly made my way to the register where I patiently waited my turn in line not knowing whether or not I should
A. Pretend to not hear my screaming child
B. Lash out in anger and make a scene
C. Perform and exorcism..."demons be gone!"
or
D. Make an announcement over the speaker apologizing for my child's behavior
I chose A, the less aggressive route.

While standing in line, both the cashier and the bagger were commenting, "boy some one's not happy"..."I think some one needs a nap", I quietly said to myself, "someone needs more then a nap...and he's going to get it!". Then from behind me a hear a booming voice, "YOUNG MAN...YOUNG MAN...don't you talk like that to you mother. You need to stop it!"Usually, I think I would be bothered by someone else trying to discipline my child, but this time, this old man's attempts were welcomed. In fact, I thought to myself, who else wants a shot at it. Apparently what I was doing didn't seem to be very effective. And believe it or not, Kaleb actually calmed down a little bit...at least to point where I could hear what the cashier was saying.

Well, not even a week later we made a quick run to Wal-mart (you would think I've learned my lesson by now) and again, a very similar situation occurred. Kaleb got in trouble for trying steal. So I put him in the cart for a little time out. He began screaming and jumping making a huge scene, when again, I hear another voice. This one not so loud but a little bit more stern, "NO, YOU DON'T DO THAT! you need to sit down right now." She repeated herself over and over until Kaleb stopped. I turn around to see a sweet old lady getting after Kaleb. Again, I welcomed her attempts with open arms. After Kaleb settled down I smiled at her and thanked her for her help. She smiled and patted me on the back, comfortly saying, "no problem sweetie...I use to be where you are".

It really does take a village to raise a child, unfortunately in my case, I think it might take an army.